How to Protect Your Marriage From an Affair

Have you ever been hungry, I mean really hungry? One activity that leaves me ravenous is scuba diving. We'll come in from a day in the water and I feel like I could eat a horse. I'm also not nearly as picky as to what I eat as I normally am; just give me food.

Fortunately, for most of us hunger is not something we suffer from for very long. But when we are extremely hungry, we’ll eat whatever is available even if it's harmful. The poorest in Haiti are known to make cookies out of mud just to have something to feed their bellies.

When we hunger, we’ll choose good food over something that barely fills us. But the choice food has to be readily available. On the other hand, when we are extremely full, we don’t even have room for that extra piece of dessert - no matter how tempting it is.
That level of fullness, on an emotional basis, is what is necessary to protect our marriages from the threat of adultery. But so often we fail to truly feed our partner. At first, we feed each other well. We lavish them with affection, attention and love. But over time we may unintentionally stop providing a banquet and switch instead to crumbs. We can get caught up in the busyness of life, careers, kids or ourselves and unintentionally leave our loved one hungry.

Studies show that up to 55% of men and 45% of women admit to committing adultery. Unfortunately, this isn't limited to the secular world. Christian marriages suffer from high levels of adultery as well. 

According to research, the factors placing a marriage at greatest risk include:

1. Lack of love and affection
These are the essential ingredients in any marriage. Without them the relationship starves, making it easy for a partner to be tempted to stray. Speak your partner's love language and they'll be well fed.

2. Loneliness
Whether it's spent on a career or pursuing other interests, time apart can leave each other hungry. Make dedicated time to spend together as a couple and you'll stave off hunger.

3. Lack of intimacy
God created sex as a wonderful gift for marriage. Don't neglect your partner's needs or hold back sex as a penalty. Feed one another's emotions and bodies. 

The enemy delights in damaging Christian marriages. Don't help him by failing to feed your relationship. Be vigilant and protect yours from attack.

Message for the Journey:

Time, attention and love are the choice foods of any relationship. Be sure to serve them to your partner each day. Keep them full and they'll not hunger for another.

"He who is full loathes honey, but to the hungry even what is bitter tastes sweet."
Proverbs 27:7

If you enjoyed this article, why not share it with a friend, tweet it and "like" it on Facebook.

If you aren't a subscriber, I'd love to welcome you to the Lessons for the Journey community. Receive a free copy of The Uncut Diamond e-book when you subscribe.


  1. Great post and so very true, marriage is work and God must be the center of it in every area, if we allow ourselves to rule in an area of our marriage and not let God you can rest a sure that the enemy will use it.

  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

  3. I found you listed directly above my blog listing on the Top 25 Faith blogs. Themes that interest me brought me here to visit. Eloquently-shared truth is why I am your newest follower on FB.

    My marriage is a rare survivor of infidelity and I can attest to the truth in this post. Thank you for being an advocate for marriage!